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Blue Blooper Blues/Transcript
(The BT Productions logo fades in. After it fades out, the title card of the episode is shown. After that fades out, we see the scene of a railroad track. Microsoft Hazel is sitting on the train tracks, bent on suicide-by-train. The camera scrolls up to see Beulah awaiting Hazel's death. Beulah is narrating.) Beulah: (narrating) Poor Hazel. In a few minutes it will all be over. And for the first time since she met him, she'll be happy. Poor miserable, lovesick girl. I suppose people will say that I should have helped her. I know, but it's better this way. I'll never forget that first morning when it all started, if ever there were two true friends. That was us. (Flashback.) Beulah: (narrating) And then he walked by. (Microsoft Mike is walking down by the street.) Beulah: (narrating) When Hazel first saw him, I'd thought she'd flipped her lid. And she did. From the very beginning, there was a strong magnetic connection between them. I'd tried to stop her, but it was no use. Hazel had fallen madly in love with this boy, and it only got worse once the rich princess got involved. (A montage of Hazel and Mike is played. While Hazel is pushing Mike up the swing, Microsoft Mary sees Mike. She immediately takes him in on his arms. Hazel walks up, angry, but Mary closes the umbrella on her.) Beulah: (narrating) Hazel got jealous that a love rival is also after her boy, and tried to win back his affections by any means necessary. I tried to warn Hazel that the boy is a gold digger and she should just give up, but to no avail. (Hazel goes out to present a single flower to Mike. Beulah tries to stop Hazel to no avail. Hazel presents the flower, only to discover that Mike has outdone her.) Beulah: (narrating) Hazel was not done yet. She even went into slavery all to impress Mike. But the princess kept outdoing her. (Hazel tries to present perfume, a ring, and a car to Mike, but Mary keeps outdoing her in every gift.) Beulah: (narrating) Once Hazel realized that the boy was leaving her for the princess, she became really depressed. She tried to drink to wash away her sorrows. Once that didn't work, she literally tried to throw herself down the gutter. And that's when I had to step in. (Hazel drinks alcohol in an attempt to wash away her sorrows. Once her eyes indicate that she is full, she tries to throw herself down the gutter, only for Beulah to save her.) Beulah: (narrating) And then it all came to a head once the boy married his princess. (While Beulah tried to resuscitate Hazel, the car that Mary was driving passes by again, drenching Beulah and Hazel with water. Mary's car now has luggage on it, and the sign says that she and Mike were "Just Married". Flashback end.) Beulah: (narrating) I still feed bad for Hazel, I admit it. But at least my Scotty remained loyal to me. (Beulah brings out a picture of Radar Overseer Scotty.) Beulah: (narrating) We got married in LTIB 72. And I hope it stays that way, unlike Hazel's situation. (Beulah kisses Scotty's picture several times and even hugs it.) (Beulah: (narrating) Yes, we are going to stay together the rest of our lives. (However, Beulah's idyllic world is suddenly shattered when a car drenches her in water. She looks out to see Scotty driving by with Microsoft Sam, with a "Just Married" sign hanging off the car. It appears Scotty has divorced from Beulah to be with Sam, proving himself to be just as unloyal as Mike was. Now just as dejected as Hazel, Beulah walks by her on the train tracks. Hazel moves aside and allows Beulah to join her. The train's whistle sounds louder as the scene fades out, leaving their fates uncertain.) Category:Transcripts